


You Never Know

by Vanessa_Cocotea



Category: Doctor Who: Eighth Doctor Adventures - Various Authors
Genre: Gen, Mystery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-14
Updated: 2014-01-14
Packaged: 2018-01-08 17:34:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1135489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vanessa_Cocotea/pseuds/Vanessa_Cocotea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From 2009:</p><p>The Doctor and Fitz get seriously weirded out by a museum that isn't...a museum...</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Never Know

"Ahh! Splendid!" The Doctor gazed at the data in pure delight. "Fitz!"

"What is it, Doctor? You sound excited. Let me guess, the TARDIS's chameleon circuit is repaired and the TARDIS has disguised herself as a giant Weetabix biscuit." Fitz teased. He wasn't overly concerned. The Doctor could get excited about the most mundane things. He supposed that could be considered a virtue. Still, it could also be trouble.

"Sadly, no. About the chameleon circuit, that is. As for the old girl turning herself into a Weetabix biscuit...Honestly, Fitz! Credit her with some self-respect!" He chuckled. "No, she's found a new planet. There's not much information on it, though. But the climate is temperate, the atmosphere breathable and there don't appear to be any wars or other conflicts going on. What do you say we take a looksee?"

"Sounds okay. Does this planet have a name?"

"Uhm, yes... Cotafrok."

"Cotafrok?? What is it? The planet of the clothing freaks?" Fitz laughed as the Doctor set the coordinates. "Oh, we have GOT to see this place! I can just imagine it, all the inhabitants are animated shoes and trousers and waistcoats. Freaky. You'll have make sure you don't mistake any of the natives for your frock coat! You might get accused of kidnapping."

The Doctor shook his head, chuckling. "Come on, Fitz. We're here. Oh, and leave the cigarettes and paraphernalia behind. If your wild fantasies are true, the cigarettes could be more trouble than usual."

Fitz sighed. "Yes, I suppose you're right." He laid a nearly empty cigarette packet and a matchbook on a nearby table and started out the door.

"HALT!" The Doctor crooked his finger. Fitz walked back over to him. The Doctor immediately searched him, patting Fitz down thoroughly. From one of Fitz's back pockets, the Doctor extracted a full pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He raised an eyebrow.

Fitz sighed again. "Can't blame a bloke for trying." The Doctor made one last search and when he was satisfied Fitz was cleared of smoking paraphernalia, he gestured towards the TARDIS doors. "Shall we go?"

********

They stepped out of the TARDIS doors to find themselves directly in front of a large building. It was identified as the "Collarelle Museum". The Doctor's interest was immediately piqued. Fitz was not quite so enthusiastic.

"Seems to be a history museum by the look of it." The Doctor remarked. "Fascinating. Let's go inside." He grinned.

"There's no one about. It could be closed." Fitz muttered, almost hopefully.

"Oh, it must be open. I don't see a "closed" sign, do you?" The Doctor bounded up the short flight of steps and through the doors. Fitz followed, still none too thrilled. "Oh well," He thought, "Maybe there's a music section somewhere."

There was not a single living being inside the museum. The circular entrance hall had corridors branching off in several places, much like the console room of the TARDIS. The place looked well cared for, but it was absolutely deserted. The Doctor chose a corridor at random and found himself in a room devoted to shops throughout the ages. Exhibits were placed at random around the room. Nothing in displays, it was as though they represented actual marketplaces throughout the history of the planet. The Doctor noticed something else as well. There was a feel to the place as though something was "off". He turned to Fitz, who was beside him and looking round, to ask him if he noticed the same sense.

"Fitz, is it just me, or do you sense a slightly "off" feeling to this museum?" Fitz didn't answer. The Doctor asked again. No answer. He placed a hand on Fitz's shoulder. Fitz didn't acknowledge the touch, although he kept looking round.

Fitz also sensed a somewhat weird feel to the place. Like things were there, but not there. He turned to the Doctor to ask him if he had the same weird feeling. He got no response. He tried again. Nothing. He put a hand on the Doctor's arm. The Doctor didn't appear to notice the gesture, but continued to gaze round the room.

Puzzled, the Doctor touched one of the figures in a nearby display. It was utterly inert, yet it felt alive somehow. It was a feeling he'd never experienced before and it was unnerving him. He touched what appeared to be a clay pot on one of the counters with the same result. He turned back to Fitz to suggest they leave the room and try to find a curator or someone who could explain the nature of the place. Fitz was simply staring in his direction. He was looking at the Doctor, but at the same time, seemed to be examining a book in his hands. The Doctor was becoming quite uneasy. He had absolutely no way to explain what was going on. He seemed completely unable to get through to Fitz, even though Fitz seemed perfectly fine. The Doctor needed answers. He had to find someone from the museum. Hoping Fitz would be all right, he went off down the next corridor he saw.

Fitz was having much the same worries, which increased when he saw the Doctor taking off down another corridor. He started to follow, when he thought he noticed a figure in one of the other corridors. He changed direction and followed, hoping the Doctor would be all right and hoping, also, for some answers...

********

The figure Fitz had seen looked as though it was peeking round a column at him. He got closer only to find that the figure was merely meant to be looking at a sort of map on the column. The figure gave him the same sense of unease that every other element of this museum did. It was starting to seriously "freak him out" as Sam used to say. He also realised that it felt as though the museum was keeping an eye on him, though there were no visible signs of anything that resembled a monitor or closed-circuit device. Fitz took off to find the Doctor, hoping to find some way to communicate with him. He was also keeping an eye out for a canteen of some kind where he might get at least a beer or an ale...something.

********

The Doctor was also feeling that sense that he was being surveyed in some way, though he had no idea how. He couldn't see anything that resembled any sort of surveillance camera. He noticed as well that none of the figures or portraits he encountered gave that feeling of watching him. The other thing the Doctor found disturbing was that there appeared to be no other visitors to the place. Apart from Fitz and himself, it seemed utterly deserted. Nothing made any sense. "What was this place? What was the object of its curious qualities?" He needed tea and Fitz. He went back to a directory he'd seen near the entrance to a neighbouring corridor.

*******

The directory the Doctor found indicated a canteen located down the corridor, turn left, down another corridor, another left, down another corridor..."Turn left", the Doctor mused. No, second door on the right proclaimed the directory. The Doctor grinned, thinking that, hopefully, SOMETHING in this place would be normal. He pushed open the canteen door. Everything seemed deserted, but otherwise, okay - apart from that annoying sense of unease. He walked over to a serving counter. Since no one was about, he went behind the well-stocked counter, to see if he could make his own tea. He'd just taken a step, when a steaming cup of tea appeared on the counter in front of him. The Doctor stared open-mouthed at it. This museum was just simply too weird. He'd drink the tea - if he could. Given this place, it might not be drinkable. He tentatively took a sip. Darjeeling - with just a little milk. Exactly as he liked it. The tea still had the feeling of not being "quite right", but seemed harmless enough, otherwise. He'd finish and find Fitz. Hopefully, they could find some way to communicate and solve the mystery of what was going on here.

********

Fitz had finally located a canteen. He pushed open the door, hoping the place was operational. The first thing he saw was the Doctor! He was seated at a table, drinking tea. Fitz hurried over, hoping they could communicate. He called out and got no answer. He was ready to give up. He started to feel they would never get out of here and he and the Doctor would be forever near each other, but would remain unable to talk to each other. It was too much. He sat wearily down at the nearest table - where a bottle of his favourite ale appeared next to his hand. He just stared. This was too much. But, like the Doctor, he gave the ale a try and got the same feeling the Doctor had had with his tea.

The Doctor had noticed Fitz come in and had tried to get his attention, but to no avail. "All right", The Doctor told himself, "Just relax. Take a deep breath. There has got to be a way to sort this all out." He went quiet and thought.

Fitz finished his ale, all the while, watching the Doctor and trying to think. The Doctor looked as though he'd gone inside himself. He looked like he was meditating. Fitz realised that that was probably the best idea there was to solve this ridiculous situation. He took a sorely needed rest and waited to see what the Doctor did next...

********

When the Doctor had finished his tea, he got up and started to leave the canteen and found he couldn't keep his balance. He didn't appear drunk and the floor appeared perfectly smooth and still, but he had a terrible time getting to the door. He slipped and staggered and on occasion, even took a tumble. He'd given up trying to understand this place. He just wanted to get himself and Fitz out. He finally made it to the door and out of the room. He had no trouble walking in the corridor. He decided not to think about anything, except to hope Fitz would follow him out and they would finally find a way out.

In just about any other circumstances, Fitz would have found the Doctor's exit from the canteen very funny, but not in this place. It was anything but funny. However, he had to follow the Doctor. He reckoned his trip out of the canteen would probably be just as bizarre. He wasn't wrong. However, he was so busy trying to get out of the room, he didn't notice that he'd gone out of a different door to the one the Doctor had used. His walking troubles also stopped once he'd reached the corridor. He hoped he could catch up to the Doctor. They had to get out of this place. Screw understanding it, Fitz just wanted to be out and back with the Doctor. Though, when they did make it back to the TARDIS, the Doctor would insist on discussing it. Not before Fitz had visited the TARDIS wine cellar, Fitz was certain of that!

********

Both men had decided to go through the next door they found. Both men found themselves simultaneously on the front steps of the building with a local man, who's nametag identified him as "Shooss". Neither the Doctor nor Fitz had any words for the situation. Nor did they have any words to express their joy at seeing each other properly. They just hugged each other tightly. Shooss, however, did have words and a brochure for each of them. The brochure described the theme park ride they had just been in. It explained about the unique and individual experience each visitor would have in his or her own little individual way. The attractions of the rest of the area were grandly laid out.

"We hope you have enjoyed the Collarelle Museum ride and will try some of our other unique and different attractions." Shooss grinned at them.

The Doctor and Fitz looked at each other and simultaneously exclaimed, "It was a THEME PARK RIDE!" They couldn't say more. Their minds had gone in about a thousand directions at once.

********

When Shooss came back with more brochures for his next guests, he noticed his two previous visitors collapsed on the ground. They had fainted.

FIN


End file.
